Misogyny in Japan
One of the questions I received was about Misogyny in Japan and how it compares to the USA. First of all, Japan is not like China. I’ve heard that there are still communities in China that kill female offspring like they did hundreds of years ago. With that out of the way, tradition is important in Japan like women performing tea ceremonies, Geisha (pronounced gaysha not gEEsha) and little things like women pouring drinks for men at an outing. Japanese women to seem to enjoy waiting on their men hand and foot as long as they are respected in the morning as it is their tradition after all. What bothers me is when American men come out here and demand the women do that for them and then brush it off as, “Well its tradition! Hell ya she’s gonna pour my drink!” In my humble opinion, American men shouldn’t demand this as this is not their tradition no matter how Japanese they think they are (I’m not talking about waitresses in a restaurant because that’s part of the atmosphere and tradition tied into one). Ya there really are American men who move here and think they ARE Japanese ? but that’s probably because they couldn’t get a girl in their own country because of looks and/or attitude and now they think they are mini celebrities because some jp girls will lay anyone to get a free English lesson.
Okay so I got off the subject a little. When I first arrived in Japan I had a horrible impression of Japanese women. I thought they still, for the most part, dressed in Kimonos to please their men, were looked down for speaking in public and were walked on by men 100% of the time. This was bread out of not only my own ignorance but from others as well. I've read prose that contains quite possibly 3rd hand information about women’s roles in Japan. I would like to both confirm and argue over some classic points.
As many of you know, Japan has a very long history going back thousands of years. Back then and more recently, fighting and war have been big contributors to the idea and the roles of masculinity in society. The men would fight for their country or their own honour and would be recognized as heroes. Women were taught not to have an opinion and that their place was at home with the kids. When a written and spoken language was formalized, women were given more polite verbs and their words and sentences were a lot longer.
Today while Japan is still a male-dominated society and the basic roles of women haven’t changed in theory, the actions of women have evolved though some of the rational is a little cockeyed. Like women are expected to work to help out the economy, but they are being urged to have more children because the population of Japan is getting pretty old and there aren’t enough youngsters to keep the population growing. The language has pretty much remained the same. There are still polite verbs used in formal speaking. This is not to be confused with male and female words in European languages because the difference is more dramatic in the Japanese language. What’s funny is that many American men learn Japanese from their girlfriends so they speak like gay Japanese men. It’s pretty easy to catch too! Ne?!
Even though Japanese women are more modern, they are still taught to be submissive and not speak their minds. They are taught not to have an opinion on matters because it would make them look too strong in men’s eyes. While some women take this to heart, many realize how archaic these beliefs are. One reason chikan (pervs) can get away with molesting jp girls on trains is because the women are taught not to make a scene. These same men know they could never get away with this in America. They would be thrown in jail with the quickness! Despite their teachings, many Japanese women have formed their own backbones. Though it is rare to see a woman appointed to president of a company, their thoughts and ideas are respected and heard, especially is they have longevity with the company. At my last job, my supervisor’s boss asked me to join him in a meeting to discuss our database. Not only was I the only American in that meeting but I was the only female there. My comments and ideas were well received and I gained much respect (not that I didn’t have it already) as the meeting went along. Afterwards my boss thanked me up and down and even sent me a nice E-mail with appreciation for my assistance in the matter. I already knew that I understood my job inside and out but this was the first time it was obviously recognized by a male in the company.
Men are taught not to help out with the duties of the house or with child-rearing. Whether men do this or not in the privacy of their own homes, I’m not sure. If business men are helping out the wife and kids instead of being at work, they are considered unproductive. In a Jp company, you aren’t a valuable asset if you leave the office before the boss does so the entire office usually stays very late and arrive to work early. This leaves very little time for the family even if the husband wanted to hang with them.
I’ve observed young jp men and women on dates and from what I’ve seen, they act just like American couples. Older married men in the cities are notorious for having women on the side and this is said to be tolerated by the wife as divorce and standing up for ones self is still looked down upon. Then there are the Jp men who never learn how to interact with women (or anyone for that matter) properly because they were always mamma’s boys. With this common knowledge it could be said that the misogyny in Japan isn’t necessarily due to being told how to act, it could be the effect of not knowing how to relate/react to other people and outside influences from the start. If the father is not around the mother will baby the offspring and as they grow they will not be able to make decisions for themselves. Single parenthood in the States would not create such a problem (although girls without father-figures in their lives are known to sleep around to find a positive male influence in any form they can get) because we as a society are outspoken to begin with and learn through others’ recalled experiences if nothing else. We do whatever makes sense to us and makes us happy where Japanese people do what satisfies others.
Though misogyny is prevalent in Japan, it is not argued about internally and therefore not a problem in the eyes of most Japanese citizens. In my opinion, they are doing nothing wrong except when submissiveness gets women molested or raped and they are too “proper” to tell the guy to stop it or have him arrested. The level of misogyny that remains in Japan might seem archaic and repulsive to some but it is their life to live and it’s not about to change any time soon, even with the growing Western influence. If they are happy in life and feel balanced in their own mind then that’s all that matters. Other countries have misogyny problems that are far worse and even deadly compared to what Japan has to put up with so they're doing something right!
Okay so I got off the subject a little. When I first arrived in Japan I had a horrible impression of Japanese women. I thought they still, for the most part, dressed in Kimonos to please their men, were looked down for speaking in public and were walked on by men 100% of the time. This was bread out of not only my own ignorance but from others as well. I've read prose that contains quite possibly 3rd hand information about women’s roles in Japan. I would like to both confirm and argue over some classic points.
As many of you know, Japan has a very long history going back thousands of years. Back then and more recently, fighting and war have been big contributors to the idea and the roles of masculinity in society. The men would fight for their country or their own honour and would be recognized as heroes. Women were taught not to have an opinion and that their place was at home with the kids. When a written and spoken language was formalized, women were given more polite verbs and their words and sentences were a lot longer.
Today while Japan is still a male-dominated society and the basic roles of women haven’t changed in theory, the actions of women have evolved though some of the rational is a little cockeyed. Like women are expected to work to help out the economy, but they are being urged to have more children because the population of Japan is getting pretty old and there aren’t enough youngsters to keep the population growing. The language has pretty much remained the same. There are still polite verbs used in formal speaking. This is not to be confused with male and female words in European languages because the difference is more dramatic in the Japanese language. What’s funny is that many American men learn Japanese from their girlfriends so they speak like gay Japanese men. It’s pretty easy to catch too! Ne?!
Even though Japanese women are more modern, they are still taught to be submissive and not speak their minds. They are taught not to have an opinion on matters because it would make them look too strong in men’s eyes. While some women take this to heart, many realize how archaic these beliefs are. One reason chikan (pervs) can get away with molesting jp girls on trains is because the women are taught not to make a scene. These same men know they could never get away with this in America. They would be thrown in jail with the quickness! Despite their teachings, many Japanese women have formed their own backbones. Though it is rare to see a woman appointed to president of a company, their thoughts and ideas are respected and heard, especially is they have longevity with the company. At my last job, my supervisor’s boss asked me to join him in a meeting to discuss our database. Not only was I the only American in that meeting but I was the only female there. My comments and ideas were well received and I gained much respect (not that I didn’t have it already) as the meeting went along. Afterwards my boss thanked me up and down and even sent me a nice E-mail with appreciation for my assistance in the matter. I already knew that I understood my job inside and out but this was the first time it was obviously recognized by a male in the company.
Men are taught not to help out with the duties of the house or with child-rearing. Whether men do this or not in the privacy of their own homes, I’m not sure. If business men are helping out the wife and kids instead of being at work, they are considered unproductive. In a Jp company, you aren’t a valuable asset if you leave the office before the boss does so the entire office usually stays very late and arrive to work early. This leaves very little time for the family even if the husband wanted to hang with them.
I’ve observed young jp men and women on dates and from what I’ve seen, they act just like American couples. Older married men in the cities are notorious for having women on the side and this is said to be tolerated by the wife as divorce and standing up for ones self is still looked down upon. Then there are the Jp men who never learn how to interact with women (or anyone for that matter) properly because they were always mamma’s boys. With this common knowledge it could be said that the misogyny in Japan isn’t necessarily due to being told how to act, it could be the effect of not knowing how to relate/react to other people and outside influences from the start. If the father is not around the mother will baby the offspring and as they grow they will not be able to make decisions for themselves. Single parenthood in the States would not create such a problem (although girls without father-figures in their lives are known to sleep around to find a positive male influence in any form they can get) because we as a society are outspoken to begin with and learn through others’ recalled experiences if nothing else. We do whatever makes sense to us and makes us happy where Japanese people do what satisfies others.
Though misogyny is prevalent in Japan, it is not argued about internally and therefore not a problem in the eyes of most Japanese citizens. In my opinion, they are doing nothing wrong except when submissiveness gets women molested or raped and they are too “proper” to tell the guy to stop it or have him arrested. The level of misogyny that remains in Japan might seem archaic and repulsive to some but it is their life to live and it’s not about to change any time soon, even with the growing Western influence. If they are happy in life and feel balanced in their own mind then that’s all that matters. Other countries have misogyny problems that are far worse and even deadly compared to what Japan has to put up with so they're doing something right!
Comments
Other jobs, sure but police I doubt it.